Kai & Nancy at Target

Kai is sooooooo thrilled to be at Target

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Mother’s Day

Last year on Mother’s Day I was grieving.  We had been informed that we was unable to have biological children earlier that year and I was facing an unknown timeline in the process of adopting from China.  Mother’s Day had been difficult ever since we had decided to “let nature take it’s course” and every month came back unfruitful in our pursuit. Every month was a reminder of the empty nest in our home. Every month I grieved.  Mother’s Day was a big fat reminder of the reality that was being faced every month.

Don’t get me wrong.  I was very grateful to my mother and all that she has done.  I was all about honoring her and all that she is, but it was still difficult. I wanted to have the opportunity to kiss my babies goodnight.  I wanted to be able to kiss the boo boo’s and rock the babies to sleep.  I wanted the opportunity to be the kind of mother that my mother had trained me to be.

AND then it happened.  Just a few days after Mother’s Day last year we received THE CALL.  We rushed to our computer and waited impatiently as the file loaded and we were able to gaze on his beautiful face for the first time.  Staring back at us was OUR SON!!!!!  AND his birthday was Mother’s Day 2008.  God made sure that Mother’s Day would be a celebration for the rest of my life.  Not only because I was now a mother, but my son was the best Mother’s Day present imaginable.  As I was grieving- God was preparing my future.

As we prepared our home for our son, we got the surprise of our life.  We found out that we were pregnant!  The impossible happened.  I was going to have the opportunity to experience pregnancy for myself.  I soon found out how difficult this process was to be.  It was a long first trimester.  Then it rolled into a long second trimester.  I finally got a reprieve right before we left for China- at 6 months pregnant.  I trekked through China and up the Great Wall of China 6 months pregnant.  I carried our new son Kai in a carrier on my chest (sitting on his sister) all over China.  It was worth every second! When we got home we had lots of growing pains. We are still having lots of growing pains.  Taking care of a new toddler while very pregnant was difficult.  He was a Velcro baby that only wanted his momma.  After his palate surgery in January I held him in a hospital chair for 24 hours straight while I was 8 1/2 months pregnant.  We had to make major adjustments in every aspect in our lives.  I wouldn’t change one second of it.  Everything that we go through makes us who we are today.  Every tough day and hardship has made me the person that I am today.

On March 2, 2010 we added to our family again with our happy surprise.  Kylee made me a mother for a second time in this one year period- joining our family just 4 short months after her brother.  Again we have had to make adjustments and again it is worth every bit of it.  I have a beautiful family! It is amazing what a difference a year makes!

I love my family!

We are continuing to adjust and adapt every day as we get to know our
newest member of our family. One thing I can say though is that we
LOVE this little girl. She has started smiling and it will completely
melt your heart when you see it! That with her sweet little coos have
everyone wrapped around her tiny little fingers.

This past week my momma Virgie came to stay with us for a week to help
out. She was extremely helpful. I'm not sure what we would have done
all those nights has she not come and stepped in so we could get a
couple hours sleep. I will be so glad when Kylee figures out nights
and days! Thank you again Virgie for your help!

Easter was fun at our house. Kai got to participate in a couple of egg
hunts. His first was at school and he got the concept from the start.
I have a basket and there's stuff on the ground I can put in it. He
cleaned up! He also got to hunt eggs at our house with his Paw that
came to visit. I think they both just loved chasing each other around
the yard as much as they did picking up eggs. Either way it was fun to
watch. Kai sure loves his Paw.

Watching my family grow over this past year has been amazing! I never
would have believed anyone last year if they would have told me what
Easter this year would look like. It is wonderful! I love my little
family!

Kylee Mei Miao is here!

It is with great pride and excitement that we can finally welcome
Kylee to the family! She was born March 2, 2010 at 6:45 PM. She
weighed in at 8 pounds 4 ounces and a lengthy 22 inches long.

It has taken us a while to get somewhat adjusted to having two little
ones (just when we thought we were adjusted to one). Having my mother
here for the first two weeks was a MAJOR help. We did have some
complications that made it harder for me to get around right after the
birth, so having her here really was invaluable. I love you tons mom!

Kai had a hard time at first with Mei Mei (little sister). In fact in
their first encounter- Kai hit her in the face :(. Lately he has
warmed up to her a lot. When she cries he tries to put her pacifier in
her mouth and brings her his favorite toys. When he goes to bed he
will go over to wherever she is to tell her goodnight (his version is
laying his head on you so you can give him kisses). I can't wait to
see how they will be together when they are older. I am sure there
will be plenty of "he's touching me" or " she's in my room" days but
I'm hoping there are more days full of playful laughter and sibling
bonds.

Ray is adjusting as a father of two very well. Of course we both have
our moments of being completely overwhelmed (I wish they were fewer
and farther between) but he is doing great! He changes diapers and
makes every attempt at calming her down when I need to do something
else- usually with Kai. I know it is harder for him since I breast
feed- he can't just give her a bottle to soothe her when she is
hungry. Overall I would say he has done well for the major changes
that our little family has had over the past few months. Thanks for
your help Ray!

I on the other hand feel completely overwhelmed most days. If not
overwhelmed then guilty for sure. We put Kai in "school" (I can't
bring myself to say day care) when I had to go back to work in between
the maternity leaves. At first I thought I could handle both kids and
could keep Kai home on my second leave with Kylee. Well that's not
working out so well. Granted I have still been in recovery mode
completely and I have had some complications since being home and I'm
still trying to get a hang of breast feeding and Ray has gone back to
work and my mom left after two weeks of being spoiled by her being
here and.......... Ok so mostly I feel overwhelmed. I am not super
mom right out of the gate. That is hard to admit but it is very true.
I'm sure that I will get the hang of it at some point and then
something will change again. Even thinking back to when we brought Kai
home- I had NO semblance of any routine for the first two months at
least and that was just one kiddo. Granted he was mobile and had
bigger needs than a new born.

I guess I just need to give myself a little slack and make it through
tonight before I worry about tomorrow. Thank you to everyone who
prayed for us and supported us through this journey! I felt the
prayers and support throughout and couldn't have made it without
them! Sorry it has taken this long to "introduce" our daughter but I
guess you can see where the priority lies ;)

Two and a half weeks post op

We had our two week check up this week and he passed with flying
colors!!!!! His surgical site looks great and we were cleared to take
off the splints and add back in crunchy foods! Yeah for Cheerios!
Kai is a much happier boy and is sleeping much better without the
splints.

Since the surgery Kai has decided that he also wants to walk without
his toys. He is walking all over the house! Baby locks have taken on
a whole new meaning and everything below waist level is either Kai
safe or has disapeared. He is so proud of himself too. He smiles and
laughs while he walks in big stretches.

We are starting to get into a better groove. The routine helps to make
things a little easier. It's still a learning experience every day and
I'm still not sure if I'm getting this mother thing- but I have hope.

This week Kai made a big break through with Ray. He started giving
daddy kisses on the lips- and wouldn't give them to mommy! Ray had to
go out of town for business for a couple days and we were afraid that
it would wreck the bonding progress that the boys had made. Well it
was quite the opposite! Now Kai asks daddy to pick him up and love
on him. I actually started crying when I saw Kai give daddy kisses.
They are doing so great and I love watching it!

Side note- thank you to Virgie for coming to stay with me while Ray
was gone! I loved the help and the company! And best of all I didn't
go into labor ;). Kai did miss Maw after you left though.

4 Days Post Op

Well we are finished with surgery and we are all doing better at this
point. Kai is happy that je is able to eat some food again (stage one
baby food) and we are happy that he is starting to act more like
himself. The 3 days of liquids only was incredibly hard for all of us.
Kai thought we were starving him. He kept doing all of his signs for
food and pointed to the cabinet where his food is stored. I just wish
that he could understand what we were telling him.

The surgery itself went well. It lasted just about an hour once it
finally got started. He had some post op pain problems and some minor
bleeding the first night. I stayed with him and slept (if you can call
it that) in the reclining chair holding Kai all night. He was given
pain meds around the clock and IV antibiotics along with the routine
vital sign checks, so needless to say- we had some form of company all
night long. I'd take that at any point over hearing him crying out in
pain again though.

When the surgeons came to see him that first morning they thought it
looked awesome. I thought it looked something like raw hamburger but
it was still so fresh of a surgical site. We were able to go home that
next morning with oral pain meds, syringe feeders, and splints for his
arms to keep "foreign objects" out of his mouth. I was just happy to
be getting back to my own house. I MAYBE got 2 hours of sleep all
night and I was ready for my tag team partner to take over.

I have to add that Ray's parents drove up from Houston to help out
before and after the surgery. They were invaluable! Ray's mother did
laundry every day, helped keep the house clean, and helped with meals.
I was also able to get a shower in everyday while they kept an eye on
Kai! (Lately this is a big deal- there just aren't enough hours in the
day to get everything done and I am still figuring out how to be a
mom). I just can't thank them enough for all of their help! They may
not think they did much, but those 30 minutes while you guys had him
in the stroller so I could get stuff done were the best ever, or just
sitting with us while Kai was in surgery so that we weren't alone made
all the difference! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

So after we got home from the hospital Ray and his parents took over
so I could get a much needed nap and they got Kai down for a nap as
well. There was a lot of cuddling that first day home. I'm still not
sure who needed it more- Kai or me. Kai's fluid intake still was
pretty minimal but we were getting wet diapers so I wasn't too
worried. That first night home Kai slept part of the night in the
stroller and the rest in bed with us. For the first 3 days it's
important to keep the head elevated 30 degrees to help with swelling
and drainage, so the stroller was ideal for us. We were able to
control the head angle better, and he was on pain meds so he really
didn't care.

The next day our super trooper must have forgotten that he had surgery
because he was ready to go. He wanted to play full speed and eat.
That's when it got hard. He started refusing his fluids to try and
convince us to give him something better. We even called the doctors
office to see if they had suggestions short of force feeding. They
just told us to keep offering the fluids and hang in there until
tomorrow. Little comfort when your little man is screaming from
hunger- not mouth pain. He finally got interested in Carnation instant
breakfast in whole milk from a "big boy" cup. It was a mess but at
least he was taking it! It seemed to fill his belly better than the
apple juice had and he started calming down. At that point I didn't
care how many bibs or outfits we went through. I was just happy he was
taking SOMETHING. That night Ray took night duty so I could sleep and
ended up sleeping in the recliner with Kai for a good portion of the
night. I really do have a great hubby!

Things got a little better yesterday when we could add in stage one
baby food. We are also allowed mashed bananas (Kai's favorite), rice
cereal, and anything that we can get to that consistancy. Now Kai is
eating like it's his last meal! He will scarf down a ton of food and
ask for more. We just hope we didn't take a step backward on the trust
front there. If only he could understand why we are doing all of this!
But with the return of food we are also starting to see a more normal
Kai. He is a touch more clingy but is full of energy and spunk. He is
also loving his balloons from "Aunt" Stacy. Thanks Stacy!

I am hoping that once the first week is behind us and we get closer to
getting his arm splints off we will get back to a completely normal
little man. I might miss some of the cuddle time, but it will be nice
to have this behind us.

Thanks to everyone for your prayers and support during this time of
need! It is getting a little bit better every day!

Surgery Day

Today is the day Kai gets his palate repaired.

The surgery was delayed due to others taking longer than expected. So now we wait