So after a quick little nap with Kai I am finally ready to add a little of my perspective to today. So far Ray has been doing such a good job that I felt that I had little to contribute. I figured no one really wanted to hear about my melt downs and freak outs (but trust me- they were happening everyday) and to be honest I have been EXHAUSTED every day. If you feel tired reading Ray’s accounts of our activities- try doing them while pregnant!
Today started off emotional for me. I know that is absolutely normal, and the pregnancy hormones really don’t help this part of the trip. At breakfast all of the other families were excited as well and full of anticipation as we all couldn’t stop talking about what was about to happen. We are about to meet OUR CHILDREN! Several of the other mothers tried to reassure me that I was going to do just fine as a first time mother. All I could think about was the possibility of rejection and lots of crying- Kai and me.
Soon it was time to make the trip to the registration office to meet our little ones. Some of the families were able to make small talk to try and pass the time. I couldn’t do anything other than panic. My palms were sweaty, I thought for sure my heart was going to leap right out of my chest, and crying was just a moment (or hard blink) away. The emotional messages that we each made for Kai on video before we left the hotel didn’t help.
I loved the fact that we could see little faces at the door as we pulled into the parking lot. This also meant that there were already crying moms on the bus though as they spotted their little one, and my raw emotions were almost sent over the edge.
We did manage to make it into the building and …..no Kai. I think that Ray and I handled it surprisingly well. Ray just relied on his crutch- photography, and I tried to capture some family firsts on video for others in our group.
EVERYTHING STOPPED the minute I heard them announce Kai’s orphanage and name. Ray and I made our way past all of the commotion to try and spot OUR little man. And there he was! True to Kai fashion he was sporting a girls jacket (but really with as handsome as he is… he pulled the look off without a problem). They tried to hand him off to Ray, and that didn’t go very well. Next it was my turn to try.
OK so far- he came to me and there was no crying. I have to say that I was immediately relieved! I cried (big surprise), but recovered faster than I thought I would be able to. HE IS GORGEOUS! Far more so than any picture can ever depict! I did have a moment when I really was still in disbelief that I was HOLDING MY KAI!
We made our way over to a more secluded area of the room so that we could have a little family time to get to know each other. I had to take the top layer coat off so that I could see his hands. Those tiny little fingers were the most precious fingers that I had ever seen in my entire life! I could tell that he was happy to see them again too because he started to become more animated once the coat came off.
The bear that we brought was fun for about 2 seconds. The winner of the day was cheerios! This was a great bonding activity for Ray and Kai and was thrilling to witness. Kai (who has WAY more than 4 teeth) LOVED taking the cheerios from Ray’s hand. Whenever the hand went empty he would point back to the container to tell Daddy- more please.
When Ray got up to sign paperwork, the cheerio dispensing role went to me. Now Kai decided that it was time to share, and he started feeding ME cheerios. I bawled! It had been a total of about 20 minutes with him and already he was seeing me as someone that he wanted to share his precious cheerios with!
At that moment I knew that I was going to be OK. This little guy really is as happy as the little one in the pictures! I will never know how I got to be so very blessed in my life and will never be able to express my gratitude for all of my blessings.
The rest of the day I kept waiting for the other side. When was I going to get the screaming kiddo that I had worried sick about? When was he going to get tired of this new lady that just happened to have food all of the time? I have to say……I am still waiting.
When we got back to the room we played with stacking cups for an hour. He smiled and interacted with family over Skype. We crawled and walked the hall in the room. The mirror provided tons of entertainment! He explored almost every inch of this room. And somehow we avoided a melt down. The closest that we got was when we tried to put him in the carrier to go sign paperwork, and even that was quickly resolved once out of the carrier. Bath time was a blast with splashing and laughing. Then another bottle was all it took to get him out for the night.
I have discovered that the description of a “restless sleeper” doesn’t even begin to describe his sleep so far. He has been all over that bed. While we attempted to cuddle I got pushed, nudged, and kicked. He has been on his back and each side at least 4 times each within a 4 hour period. This should make things fun when we get back home. Regardless- he is a beautiful little angel asleep or awake and I wouldn’t take back a single bit of our first day together!